Whoever takes parenthood lightly is a fool.
If you think the sleepless night endured during the infant stage are the hardest part, well they’re only the beginning.
My son is a lot like me. Really quiet. Kind hearted. Little shy. Naive. However, with a hint of a mean streak when provoked.
I never know what I’m gonna get from day to day. Whether it’s going to be a day full of straight being a big lovable teddy bear or if he’ll flip and have a mood swing over what socks he’s wearing with what shoes. Seriously, I question whether I was this terrible at that age or not. Regardless I love the kid and I’ve got his back no matter what.
Friday I’m on my way to the school to pick him up. He calls before I even get there. Requesting that I park so we can go have a little discussion with his sixth period teacher. I have my youngest with me, so I’m not really interested in starting WWIII in front of her. I tell we’ll talk about it and I’ll make the best decision about how to proceed. Now, this is the same teacher that called me about two months ago regarding his disrespectful behavior in class. J called her a racist. Because she’s always yelling at the Black and Hispanic kids. Writing them up and putting them out of class. As a parent I know what my child is capable of. I know the good, bad, and downright ugly. I know that if irritated his typical teenage behavior will result in a loud sigh and an eye roll. Depending on my mood it may irritate me more than it should. Well on Friday they were having a test, she accused him of yelling out, talking, and singing during the test.
1. He wouldn’t yell during a test.
2. Yes he’ll talk.
3. Since the beginning of the voice change and associated cracking I have requested that he not sing in public. He learned this lesson the hard way after getting clowned. So he doesn’t sing in public.
J then tells me that his response was he didn’t do it. As the teacher got in his face and yelled and the first spit spray hit his face. He lost it. He’s got a thing with personal space. He slammed his book down and said he didn’t do it. She then threatened to give him a zero and call me. He advised her to call me. Well she called me at home. Left a message. That I saved. Every child in the class is yelling he didn’t do it in the background as she goes on a tirade on my home voicemail.
Well in the meantime I rip him a new one. Simply because I’ve asked him to never disrespect an adult even if they are in a wrong. Let me fight that battle. Keep yourself out of trouble. In the midst of this discussion, she chose to call my cell phone.
1. She did not ask for Ni-Kesha Williams or Ms. Williams…she said may I speak to the parent or guardian of Jalen Williams
2. She told me my child was terrible. Horrible behavior. Poor student. Yet this is the same student who has maintained a B average in your class all year. Continue…
3. She then proceeded to provide the details of the day’s travesty…
I let her speak before I presented my rebuttal. SHE INTERRUPTED ME!!
Anyone who knows me, knows, that if we’re involved in a serious discussion; don’t interrupt me. It’s a major pet peeve of mine. I requested that she let me finish. She kept interrupting me, because she didn’t like what I was saying. By then my nerves were wrecked…my response
“If the way you’re speaking to me is any indication of how you speak to your students. I understand why you don’t receive the response you desire.”
Long background to get to one simple point. I have always been under the impression that teachers and parents are involved in a partnership. They’re doing what’s best for the child. Not what the other wants. I simply wanted this woman to listen long enough to get another point of view. Instead she was too busy trying to get me told, which she achieved no success. I advised her to think outside of the box. If the majority of your students in your five classes are having a poor response to your classroom tactics then possibly revision is necessary. I also let her know that as a parent providing my child with a zero on a test is not an acceptable course of action. If it’s that extreme, I need to be involved. Her response, she doesn’t have time to call me.
At the end of the conversation I discovered that my son is sitting in a group of excessive talkers. I brought her attention to this and she agreed that maybe it would be best to separate the group. Ummm you’ve been teaching for over twenty years, why didn’t this occur to you. I also asked, that if the talking is that excessive put him at the front of the class beside her desk so there will be no further issues. I wanted to challenge her to look at the bigger picture. Setting a child up for failure is not punishment that will result in a change of action. It’s something that will create bitterness and push them further away from their educational goals. As a teacher shouldn’t your primary concern be the encouragement of a student and not just your paycheck.
I know people may think that as a parent I’m looking at my child through rose colored glasses. I’m not. I love that boy, but as Pro would say there’s at least one day in the week I want rip his larynx from his throat. However, I know that if he was a behavior issue, his grades would be terrible and five other teachers would call me weekly. Instead I get notes, emails, and calls about what I joy he is and how well mannered he is. So I’m not getting it. Okay, Monday vent session over. Sorry it’s so long.
